Flight Delayed

OK, so here's the deal. We got to spend most of last weekend in the Dallas/Fort Worth Airport. If you've spent a weekend in a major airport you'll know this is not something you would choose to do, (unless the alternative is flying in lightning with a tornado warning thrown in, which it was.)

When our flight was cancelled a harried ticket agent booked us on a morning flight. Mindful of the cost of lodging, we decided we would tough out the night in the terminal. We were instructed to retrieve the luggage we had checked, and given a printout of our new flights. We got the suitcase and proceeded to check-in armed with our new flight information. We intended to check the bag so it could be re-tagged and then go through security to the terminal where the comfy chairs were. (This is a relative statement.)

Glitch number 1: You can't do that. According to US Airways you can't check baggage overnight because of federal rules. My guess is the operative words are something like "unattended" but given the fact that airlines have slashed staff, late night baggage security may have seemed expendable.

Glitch number 2: The three ounce rule. Since 9-1-1 you can't have more than 3 ozs. of liquid in your carry-on. As we had some toiletries in the checked bag we couldn't simply schlep it through security until morning when it could be checked. Besides, since airlines now charge for checked luggage we had stuffed everything we both needed for a week in the one bag. As a result it would be hard to convince security that the bulging, zipper strained Samsonite was "carry-on."

Glitch number 3: Lacking services outside the secure area. By the time US Air had cancelled the flight, re-scheduled everyone and we had done the luggage dance, we were hungry. Bouyed by the fact that our ticket agent had told us cots and pillows would be delivered soon we decided to go and seek out a meal. I spoke to a police officer who ended the conversation with "I only tell you this because it's true." What he said was that there was no food in the airport outside the security area except a coffee shop two terminals away only accessible by shuttle.

As we were seriously hungry and, as the officer pointed out having "plenty of time," we decided to go for it. This involved taking all of our luggage because "since 9-1-1" there are no baggage lockers outside secure areas. (I put "since 9-1-1" in quotes because the standard explanation for any inconvenience is either "it's an act of God," or "since 9-1-1," in airport situations. When I pointed out to someone that 9-1-1 was ten years ago, sufficient time to plan for these situations, the history lesson appeared to be unappreciated. In fact, most of the people we dealt with during this situation were obviously stressed and generally humorless, another artifact of reduced staffing.)

When we got there the coffee shop turned out to be more of a pastry shop in the middle of the international arrivals terminal. Niether of us felt like being on display in our misery. Fortunately, I noticed though there was a Grand Hyatt in the terminal so we went to see if they had a restaurant. They did, however, the average price of an entree was around $28.00. Still, the atmosphere was nice, waitstaff helpful and sympathetic, and the food delicious. The wine also helped our attitude although at $12.00 a glass we didn't "attitude adjust" quite as much as we might have.

Glitch number 4: Ticket agents best intentions are sometimes unmet. (In my first draft, this glitch was less generously expressed.) After we finished our meal we took a shuttle back to the original terminal, specifically the baggage area, where we expected to see cots. No cots. No ticket agents. The only US Airways employee to be seen was a baggage service worker who was occupied with flights that were trying to get on the ground and out of the storms.

Glitch number 5: Lodging when scores of flights are cancelled. Hundreds of stranded passengers equal strained hotel resources. Since we were not anxious to spend the night in the chairs in the baggage area I went exploring.

Pleasant surprise number 1: Courtesy phones with direct lines to services. Behind the baggage carrell and the seats that surround it, I found a bank of phones with direct lines to various hotels, rental car agencies, etc. The first two hotels I tried were full but the desk at the last suggested a Marriot that also had a direct line on the courtesy phone. I dialed and was told "yes, we have rooms available." When I gave her my name she said "did you just call?" Getting a sinking feeling I told her I hadn't. Thankfully she replied: "That's OK we can handle you both," and gave me directions to their shuttle.

Pleasant surprise number 2: Shuttle drivers, while insane behind the wheel, are cheerful and helpful. Dallas/Fort Worth looks like a cloverleaf in search of a highway. Consequently, at 60 mph and inches away from some other shuttle, passengers spend most of whatever trip they are on nearly horizontal to their left or right depending on the direction of the curve. (There are no straightaways which is probably a blessing because I don't want to know how fast one of those top heavy busses will go.)

Still, the drivers were invariably helpful, rushing to help with luggage and keeping up a steady stream of genuinely funny albiet occasionally off-color, banter.

After an uneventful night in an actual bed, (It might have been eventful had we stayed in the hotel lounge any longer as the place was full of New York Giant and Dallas Cowboy fans - but that's another story,) we returned to DFW and in deepening clouds made our flight that connected through Regan International Airport in Washington, DC.

Glitch number 6: Boarding passes and gate numbers don't always match. Four hours into a six hour layover in Washington we discovered that the gate number on our boarding passes didn't match the overhead listings in the terminal. I approached a man wearing a US Airways ID and was told that the overhead listing was correct. He directed us to a shuttle to the appropriate terminal.

Pleasant surprise number 3: As long as you take the airline shuttle you don't have to go through security again.

During our remaining wait we listened to announcements that rerouted ticket holders to several different connections, to different gates. In one case passengers were sent to a new gate and a few moments later asked to return to the original one. This caused a general guffaw among those of us who were relatively stationary and a visible blush on the part of the man making the announcement.

Just before the last leg of our journey I noticed a weather report being shown on an overhead monitor. The meteorologist was describing a tornado warning in east Texas. Boarding our flight I imagined a ticket agent saying to a passenger at the now distant Dallas/Fort Worth airport: "I'm sorry sir, we cannot help you, this is an act of God."